This is my tenth post in a series, where each Monday (if possible) I will post about a point of reflection or insight that I will use to reflect and meditate on during the week. In order to make it a bit more focused and interesting, I will attempt to do this with topics beginning with letters from A to Z. I have often found that having a specific topic to reflect and/or meditate on during the week really lends itself to interesting insights and growth, because you not only have several days to reflect and meditate on the topic, but you have several days to put any lessons and insights that you discover to work in your every day life. For those that follow me on Twitter (@JasonLivingNow) I will try to write updates as the weekly topics come up during meditations, moments of reflection, or just during everyday life. To view the current and previous entries in this series, please visit the: Reflections and Insights A Through Z section.
J= Judge Not Others: The act of judging another person immediately causes separation between our self, and the other person. Judgment prevents us from acting compassionately, as well as empathetically understanding where the other person may be coming from. It is extremely easy to judge or condemn someone who may be rude or hateful to us; however, we may not know the whole story of that person, we may have no idea the hurt and pain that the person is suffering from. By simply judging the person and condemning another’s actions outright, we are in effect closing the channels of communication with that person, as well as our hearts. By not rushing to judgment, we can show true compassion to everyone, even those who may not practice or reflect compassion towards others.
“If you judge people, you have no time to love them” – Mother Teresa
Judgment also hampers our own personal and spiritual development, because judgment is often used as a defense mechanism, because instead of examining ourselves, and rectifying our own faults, we simply point out the faults of others, or bolster our ego by saying, “well at least I’m not as bad as them”, or “I would never do that”.
Now this does not mean that we should be complacent in the face of abusive or destructive behavior. Too often, people use the Biblical scripture Matthew 7:1, “Do not judge, or you will be judged”, as a catch-all excuse to not step in when abusive or destructive behavior demands it. When someone is being abusive or destructive to themselves or others, we should act as compassionately as possible, but not hesitate to step in and make efforts to stop that kind of behavior.
Practical Tip: During the week, if you find yourself judging someone, stop yourself and examine why you are judging that person. Are you projecting your own insecurities or unexamined faults on to them? Are you judging in order to make yourself feel better? Are you judging out of your own ignorance to their situation? If you are judging in order to project your own faults, or in order to make yourself feel better about something, examine the underlying cause or issue that needs to be addressed. If you are judging out of ignorance or habit, try to show love and compassion, and make an effort to understand where they are coming from.
I would love to see your thoughts and comments on judging others, and what you have done to stop yourself from rushing to judgment against others. If you wish to use the topic of judgment as a point of reflection during the week, I would love for you to share any insights that come up.
Please come back next week for the next installment of this series, and as always if you enjoyed what you read, please share on social network sites, subscribe to this site, and share this site with others!
Also please check out my book, “The Path: Using the Religions of the World as a Guide to Personal and Spiritual Development.” (Click on the book cover to view on Amazon.com)
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brittskrabanek
July 30, 2012 at 8:11 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
Personally, I just don’t say any judgmental things out loud any more. I stop myself before I vocalize. Then, it disappears as quickly as it came.
Jason E. Marshall
August 13, 2012 at 8:36 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
It is amazing how that works! Too often we don’t let our inner filter kick in until it is too late!
granbee
July 30, 2012 at 4:05 pm (UTC -6) Link to this comment
No gossipping, either!
Jason E. Marshall
August 13, 2012 at 8:40 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
Absolutely not! ;
largerthanlifeblog
July 30, 2012 at 9:08 pm (UTC -6) Link to this comment
Hi Jason,
Thanks for dropping by and liking my post. I have just started and does boost my courage.I just read this post of yours & its great (especially because you have also provided with a practical tip). It is necessary for self evaluation and betterment.Coming to being judgemental- I totally agree what I just read here.After all,its always better to judge ourselves and overcome our drawbacks rather than wasting our judgement on others.The tagline of your blog is true and inspirational.We remain so occupied with future that its too late when we realize we have not lived our present.I am following your blog to remain updated 🙂
Cheers!
Sayori
Jason E. Marshall
August 13, 2012 at 8:40 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
I’m glad that you enjoyed this post! I enjoyed your site as well! Hang in there, blogging is fun and exciting, but it can be frustrating in the begining.
Thomas Ross
July 31, 2012 at 12:36 pm (UTC -6) Link to this comment
So important. To set aside judgment is a central tenet of the Tao. “If you don’t understand this, you will get lost, however intelligent you are. It is the great secret.”
Thanks for this insightful message.
Will also be following you on Twitter now as well. Keep writing, it’s good and important work.
Tom
Jason E. Marshall
August 13, 2012 at 8:42 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
I love that quote. I personally love how the teachings of Taoism are beautifully simple, yet they are also very deep and full of meaning. Thanks for commenting!
The Bumble Files
August 1, 2012 at 12:59 pm (UTC -6) Link to this comment
Thanks for stopping by my blog! This is a great reflection. I do my best to not be judgmental but have not have focused on it in this way. I do feel strongly everyone has their own story and it’s not my place to ever judge someone.
Jason E. Marshall
August 13, 2012 at 8:44 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
You’re welcome, and thanks for stopping by mine! I think it is very important to remember that everyone has their own story, and their own problems, so we are never really in a place to judge anyone because 1) we don’t know their whole story, 2) we don’t know how we would act or react if we were in their shoes.
yazrooney
August 25, 2012 at 5:53 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
I’ve learned that judgement of others is a good thing because in judging them, I see what I need to change. I LOVE judging people because then I get to change, and that makes me a better person. To take this approach though, you HAVE to understand that we live in a mirror universe. I wrote my perspectives here:
http://yazrooney.wordpress.com/2012/06/22/judging-others/
Thanks for your thoughts on this. Yaz
mindfulness4now
August 31, 2012 at 3:45 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
I wonder at how many times I catch myself failing at this…in oh so subtle ways and then I shake myself and take myself back to posing all those questions you mentioned….what has happened to them, why are they like this, what is being triggered in them….especially when someone is very nasty and aggressive…it’s a challenge to let them be and not enter into judgement and to hold your own space without reacting. Thanks
Scorpio Passion
October 18, 2012 at 12:51 am (UTC -6) Link to this comment
Reblogged this on TheTruthWasHere and commented:
i have read stuff like this before but this time it really stuck. thank you so much!
Fluid to Make Waves | Purpose and Dream
July 30, 2012 at 2:50 pm (UTC -6) Link to this comment
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