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We Create Our Reality
Used with permission from Publicdomainpictures.net
Today I ran across two particularly interesting quotes from Thich Nhat Hanh that really resonated with me.
“People suffer because they are caught in their views. As soon as we release those views, we are free and we don’t suffer anymore.“
and
“Every thought you produce, anything you say, any action you do, it bears your signature.”
These two quotes really resonated with me because the theme of how the internal path is reflected into the external world, and vice versa, has been a recurring theme for me this week.
First, leading up to, during, and after the North Carolina constitutional amendment this week that bans same-sex marriage, there was a huge amount of vitriol being spewed forth by conservative talking heads regarding the issue. Just watching the conservative political pundits and politicians speak about the amendment and issues facing the LGBT community, I was really struck by the amount of true hate that many of these people had. Even those that cloaked their opposition to LGBT rights in politically correct niceties such as “I’m not anti-gay, I’m pro traditional values”, seemed to harboring a great deal of resentment to a group of people that in no way poses any actual harm or threat to anyone. Period. Even though these people were clothing themselves in the cloak of righteousness, they were (and are) suffering because of the anger and ill-will that their views create internally and externally, whether or not they want to admit it, or even realize it. These people are not only experiencing internal conflict and turmoil, but externally they are influencing and/or governing over a society that is also full of conflict and turmoil. The vitriol is now ramping up even higher, because President Obama (thanks largely to Vice-President Biden’s horrid Washington D.C. sin of a truthful tongue slip), has finally came out in support of the right for same-sex couples to get married.
Now then, admittedly I generally fall into the libertarian portion of the scale when it comes to social issues, because I feel that as long as you aren’t hurting me, or anyone else, I don’t really have the right to force you to live your life a certain way, nor do I have the right to force my version of morality on you. However, no matter what end of the political spectrum you fall into, it shouldn’t be that great of a stretch to realize that every human being is a person that has the same rights and emotional needs as anyone else, and they are entitled to those rights and the fulfillment of those needs no matter their race or gender, or their sexual, religious, or political preferences.
Staying Positive When the Universe Tests You
“Always look at what you have left. Never look at what you have lost.” – Robert H. Schuller
Alright, I’ll just say it… today sucked. Bad. Last night I was up most of the night with a bad stomach bug, which involved nausea, stomach cramps, fever, and other “issues”. Even though I felt horrible, I was determined to push through and go into work today, because I am finally getting caught up. Well, the universe had other plans. On my way into work my car overheated, and it appears there will be a hefty repair bill in order.
Several hours at the dealership, and dealing with various technicians regarding what would, and what would not, be covered under warranty, made for a long and taxing morning/afternoon. Although, I had plenty of reasons to get bent out of shape and angry, I was determined to stay as upbeat as possible.
I am a huge believer in staying positive, even when the universe seems to test your moxie. After all, getting angry and upset at the stomach virus, or my car, would not improve my situation, I just needed to roll with the punches. While some events and situations from today might have stunk, it doesn’t mean that my attitude has to, nor does it mean that my life is bad. Instead of focusing on the negative, I focused on the many good things in my life, especially my wonderful family. Read more…
Chosen Family
Please check out this great story that my wife posted on her blog (www.sweetnscrappy.com).
Since my wife and I both work, ever since our son was born we have had a young Mennonite girl watch our son during the day. Unfortunately Ms. Megan is leaving us for Iowa. She and her family have been a huge part of our lives, and we are extremely thankful for their love and the wonderful impact that they have made on our son. Luckily, Ms. Megan’s mother, Anita, has agreed to continue watching our son, but Ms. Megan will be missed very much!
It is amazing how people who were once strangers can become so intertwined in our lives, that they become family to us, and impact our lives in ways that we could never have expected.
Not to be too cliche, but when we have a village, our lives are all the richer!
The Power of Spring Through It’s Festivals
“Spring adds new life and new beauty to all that is”- Jessica Harrelson
I love springtime. I love the cool rainy weather, and how all of the various plants literally spring back to life with vivid shades of color. Spring is also a time for birth and renewal, and because of this every culture and spiritual tradition has celebrated spring with various festivals, rituals, observances, and rites of passage. The festivals of the world celebrate the transition from winter, a time of scarcity and harshness, to spring which is a time of plenty as well as physical and spiritual renewal. The power of spring is best illustrated by the various religious festivals, celebrations, and holidays. Read more…
Versatile Blogger Nomination
Well, after four days of fun, fellowship, education, and spiritual growth with my Scottish Rite brethren, I decided to get caught up on my blog reading. Much to my surprise, two of my favorite blogs nominated me for the Versatile Blogger Award! This is a real treat for me because I absolutely love both of the blogs that nominated me.
I was nominated by:
A Second Cup- This is a wonderfully refreshing blog, where the author mixes various musings and insights into eclectic and humorous posts about life spiritual practices. I really enjoy reading this blog over my first (and sometimes second, or third, or fourth…) cup of coffee, and it never fails to make me smile and/or provide me with material to reflect upon.
Zen Being- This is a great blog which applies Buddhist teachings and practices to every day life. I always enjoy reading this blog, and I find the author’s insights to be extremely helpful and meaningful. This blog has continually helped me to continue striving to live in the now, and simply “be”.
Part of the nomination involves naming 7 blogs that I enjoy, other than the ones that recommended me, thus nominating them for this award: Read more…
Imperfectly Perfect
“We should find perfect existence through imperfect existence.” – Shunryu Suzuki
Life has continued to be very hectic for me in the past few weeks, and my hectic schedule was made more difficult by a Rhumatoid Arthritis flare that struck me last week. Between the stress, pain, and crap-mood inducing steroids, I really struggled to stay “tuned-in”. When I would try to meditate, catch up on some reading, or even just take some quiet time to reflect, I found myself being distracted by joint pain, or miffed about something, or a combination thereof.
Saturday morning, it was cool and rainy, but for the first time in about a week, I felt well enough to actually get up and walk around without a tremendous amount of pain. Luckily, the rain took a long enough break, that I was able to take my old corvette for a little joy ride. As I was driving, just as I did several weeks ago during a particularly hectic work week, I ran through a quick emotional and physical checklist, and quickly figured out that I really needed to “snap out of it”. Even if I was in pain, even if I was in a bad mood (drug induced or not), I needed to still strive to be the best person I could be, rather than simple wallow in negativity. After all, negativity doesn’t help yourself, or anyone around you.
As I was driving I began to look around my old Corvette and notice some of its minor character flaws. While my Corvette is no museum piece, it is in really good shape for a 37 year old sports car (most sports cars are driven into the ground… literally). However, the old girl has some faded spots, some cracks, some squeaks, etc. (I can relate). However, it has been recently restored, and almost all of these things would go wholly unnoticed by anyone other than myself. In the same way, we each have minor character flaws, many of which we keep deeply hidden, so as to put our best face out into the world, even if we are full of turmoil inside. Read more…
Make Today Meaningful
“Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend – or a meaningful day.”- H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama
Too often I find myself falling into the “just get it over with” mentality trap. Usually this occurs on Mondays, or whenever I have a daunting project/task to accomplish. The problem with this mentality is that it pulls me out of living in the now, it causes me to not enjoy the present moment, and the wonderful experience of actually “living”.
When I fall into this mentality I basically go on auto pilot, which allows negative (counter-productive) thoughts and emotions to gain a foothold in my psyche. Once this begins to occur, it is easy to allow those negative thoughts and emotions to snowball into a myriad of negative mental states. Read more…
The Power of Positive Thinking
My son loves going for rides in my old Corvette.
Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. ~Anthony J. D’Angelo, The College Blue Book
Well, I have already blown one of my New Years resolutions, which was to write a post a week. Well, sometimes life just happens, and that’s okay. I have had an extremely hectic past few weeks, and this week looks like more of the same. One thing that I have had to constantly remind myself over and over again during the hectic past few weeks has been to simply, “stay positive”. Staying positive is relatively simple, yet it has profoundly positive effects on our moods, emotions, and overall quality of life, because it helps you to make the best out of life and enjoy your present moment (living in the now).
If you stop and think about it, our moods and emotions (feelings) are largely governed by our thoughts. For example, when you are stressed out about something, you are probably running a constant stream of thoughts through your mind involving the cause of the stress (stressor). Also, if you are angry with someone, you are likewise probably running a stream of thoughts through your mind reminding yourself of all the ways you have been wronged, and how you are justifiably angry. Even negative feelings towards our jobs and relationships are governed by our thoughts towards the relationship or situation. Read more…
Three Steps to Making New Year Resolutions Actually Happen
“New Year’s is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.” – Mark Twain
It’s that time of year again, where we all celebrate the coming of a New Year, and of course make goals (resolutions) for the coming year. If you are like most people, it is probably not a surprise that research shows that almost 9 out of 10 resolutions fail. Research has also shown that while most people sincerely wish to follow through with their resolutions, within the first few weeks of the new year, most people already begin to slide back into old habits or modes of thinking, and within a few months, most people are back where they started (or even worse off). A major problem with the making and subsequent failure of resolutions is that it can lead to depression, and the reinforcement of negative modes of thinking (“I can’t do ______”, or “I have tried to _____, and failed each time”). New Year resolutions can be powerful motivation to effect positive change in your life, but it is important to understand what you really want to change about your life, and understand how to succeed, and then follow through, whether it be January 1st, or any other day of the year.
The reason that most resolutions fail is because 1) They are unrealistic, and a reasonable plan to accomplish the goal isn’t followed, 2) You aren’t truly ready to change, and 3) the underlying root cause of the problems/issues are not addressed by simply resolving to “change”.
Unwinding in Nature
Awesome sunset just after setting up camp.
With the hectic whirlwind of the holiday season upon us, it is important to take time to slow down and relax. In order to facilitate this, and enjoy some quality time together, several friends and I decided to go on a camping trip over the weekend. While choosing to undertake a camping trip in mid December meant for a cold trip, a great time was had by all, and it was a wonderful time for camaraderie, reflection, and relaxation.
During most of the year, and especially during the holidays, most of us simply buzz from one project to the next, much like a busy worker bee, and never take any time to unplug and reflect. I know that lately I have been flustered and out-of-touch because I have been trying to get caught up at work so that I can cross off many of the legal cases and projects that I have working on prior to the new year, while trying to plan holiday gatherings, and finish holiday shopping, in addition to editing chapters for my book, and writing content for this blog. Therefore, a weekend away from the rat race in order to unplug and unwind is just what i needed, and is probably a remedy that many of us could use. Read more…
